3 Habits to Cultivate In Your Singleness

There are many habits we can ultimately cultivate in our single lives. But I believe the most important thing to cultivate is our time and our relationships. You will never have this season again. You will never have this much freedom or this much time. It will be shared once you get married and it will most definitely disappear when you have a family. You also carry these relationships into your marriage. You want to cultivate these habits. Especially the relationship with yourself. How can we cultivate these habits while we walk in our singleness?

Our Spiritual Life

Our relationship with God is the most important relationship we can have in our lives. We can cultivate this through instilling habits and disciplines into our daily rhythm. Nothing is more important than taking the time to get to knowing God. I want to remind you that spiritual disciplines are meant to fill us up. They are means to grace. But they are not designed to take from us.

How can we get to know him through scripture, quiet time, prayer, and other spiritual disciplines? What disciplines are important in aiding you in growing in this relationship? Find a spiritual rhythm and stick with it. Find a new way to study scripture. Find a group of people who will help you grow in your faith. We are not meant to do any of this alone.

Our Wellness

In addition to the relationship with God is the relationship with yourself. It is important to know yourself. This is the time to really get to know yourself. To know who you are and to build that relationship with yourself. This is the time to know your habits. Know the bad habits. Know how to make decisions and discern other things. This is the time to pursue counseling or maybe even pursue mentoring. Take the time. Make the move. I am a strong promoter in therapy. Sometimes we just need people to help us in the things we cannot see for ourselves. I have seen a counselor in different seasons of my life. And, in each season, I learned how to become the best version of myself.

This is a wonderful time to establish healthy rhythms. You get to learn what works and what does not work for you. What are your hobbies? If you don't have any hobbies, this is the time to discover them. Establish a healthy lifestyle. Take time for yourself to eat well, exercise, and get enough rest. This will help you stay physically and mentally strong.

Another healthy habit to cultivate is financial stability. I know it is not the most beautiful habit. I mean, who likes to think about money? But becoming a steward of finances is such an amazing investment. This is especially true if you want to be married someday. Establishing this foundation in your singleness will assist you will when you join finances with your future spouse.

Meaningful Relationships

Cultivate meaningful relationships. Being single doesn't mean you can't have meaningful connections with friends, family members, and other people. Spend time with people who make you feel good and lift you up.

Another great relationship to cultivate during this time is growing your community. This may mean growing your already existing community. It may also mean to find your community. Who are your people? Do you know? I’m not going to say girls over bros. But I am going to say community helps you to grow and discern choices that you wouldn’t be able to make on your own. They also can become the people who know you and can keep you accountable. Such community groups could be the following:

• Small group
• Wesley band 
• Bible Study 
• Neighbors 
• Co-workers
• Fun/casual friends

We have one precious life to live. What we need to know about seasons is how They come and go. Start and end. Some seasons do last for awhile but they don’t stay forever. This means it is important to enjoy the seasons we are in. There are joys and complications of each season. But it is so interesting. You can do so much within each season. Take advantage of this. This may be exactly what you need. Keep going.  

Most importantly, cultivate a positive attitude. Being single doesn't have to be a negative experience. Embrace it as an opportunity to learn more about yourself and your needs.The grass is not always Greener on the other side but it doesn’t mean it isn’t enjoyable.